You people still read this blog??? :)

Wow, so a friend just asked me for an update. Well to my probably one reader, here it is.

1. I am leaving my job.
2. I have a new wonderful job.
3. I have a great new apartment (moving in June).
4. I am hopelessly single, mainly because I still haven't figured out what I want.
5. I am desperately looking forward to a time when I don't have to give my LIFE to a job.
6. I am healthy again. My body took a nose-dive. I'm working out again.
7. I still need new shoes.
8. I'm on a new plan to get my finances in order. For good.
9. I'm just waiting for June 7th!!!
10. I hope you're all doing well. Keep Tri-ing... I probably won't be able to get one in this year (see #6-8), but it's still in my heart!

Another one bites the dust

and so it goes.... When will I learn!? Good golly, these people are just a mess. This last one was just TOO desperate. OMG. (Oh em gee).

I felt terrible, but holy cows, chickens and goats.

Anyway, life goes on. As you will see, I have been working out like a crazy woman (can't help it really). I'm trying trying trying so hard.

Did I mention that I need new shoes? No? I need new shoes. I'm hoping that Monday or Tuesday will be the day! I went for a splendid run on Sunday on the trail - Fabulous, but afterward, everything with initials hurt. :)

It's been a better week. I was able to put a lot of things into perspective and also clean house a bit (figuratively speaking, see first paragraph). I think I'm just going to be single forever.

It's all about me

Well, that's not usually what I say, but right now, I think it has to be about me. When the world starts crumbling (or it seems to be!), I look inward. There are things that can be done. Maybe starting my day with a workout will help me be more cheerful about life in general.

I did it this morning. Literally POPPED out of bed at the thought of running with a friend (the other key). Ran 2 miles and even lifted some weights, and then made a plan with A. to meet at 6AM Mondays and Wednesdays to workout together. Amazing.

The questions you ask...

I'm feeling the need to be philosophical. The need to rant endlessly. The need to find some sense in it all. I might not even push "publish post" at the end of it all. I just need to get it out.

It was one of those days. It started out normally enough. Everything was fine. And then... Suddenly it wasn't. It was one of those delayed reactions. It's no wonder I moved through this weekend like I was in a daze. It's no wonder.

Friday ended with a blow so great, I didn't see it coming. The worst kind of sucker punch. Here I am. Here I am, blood and guts out for everyone to see, and here comes the Mack truck. Someone tell her there is a mack truck coming...

Anyone ever hear that song by Ani Difranco? Untouchable face? Well it's not quite like that, but I FEEL like that. It's not a romance go wrong (at least not the type I have with ONE other person). No, this was a different kind of romance.

Every day. Every freakin' day. I come here. I put on my coat of armor. I put on that thick skin. I do it day in and day out. And you know? I thought I had a good thing going here. I thought I was doing a good job. I thought that pouring my blood, sweat and tears into something would mean that I was doing something right. That maybe FINALLY I had found THE thing I was meant to do. Maybe I was home.

I guess that was my mistake. I got too comfortable. Who knows.

I know they're kids. I know they have no idea what their words can do. I know it.

That knowledge doesn't take away the pain. I know I've always been a sensitive sort. I've really worked on that. Thought I had made some strides. And then tonight, it all came out (thankfully in the privacy of my home). Crying like I have never cried before. Ever.

I'm the adult. I have to keep reminding myself that. While that's fine and good, I also need a healthy distraction.

The good news is that I've found an amazing group of friends. Amazing. And (get this) I found a triathlon partner (or two)! So, it's time to get back at it. Time to work on that base. Time to make some real goals. I need that intensity back in my life. Yes, I have other things to be intense about, but I need to focus more on me. Maybe that will keep me from losing myself in my work.

Still Alive

Heh, Christmas is over. New Year is here.

It's funny, I haven't been doing much running or biking, but everyone is telling me how GREAT I look. My mom had to tone down my Aunt, who was making it sound like I was the newest winner of the Biggest Loser. :)

Not sure what the secret is, except eating in moderation over the holidays. If I knew I had a big meal coming up in the evening, I really controlled what I ate during the day. Seems to have worked! Here's hoping I can keep trimming down :)

As I said, I'm not really doing anything triathlon related right now, but I AM coaching our fitness class at the school. There are 30 girls enrolled, and we have a blast. Each day half of them work out by them selves in the gym, while the rest of them come with me to do aerobics (step aerobics, tae bo, light weights). It's been a challenge to come up with new workout routines (and MUSIC), but they are keeping me on my toes!

I hope you are all doing well. I'm hoping to get to the tri club around here soon, so that I can start building a network of friends and get back to what I love.

The wagon is rolling

Heh, check out the workout calendar on the right! I am back on the wagon... have been for weeks now! Quads are coming back, so that's nice.

I love my bike! and, I'm not even talking my beautiful road bike. I love the trail. LOVE it. I even got a little courageous this weekend and drove a little ways to a spot just north of here and then rode my bike all the way to PA and back! Wahoooo!

I also just joined a very cool yoga place. And just started running again (because that was the deal... running = yoga). The teacher pushed pretty hard, but I felt like I had a brand new body by the end of it.

I hope you are all doing well! I'm thinking long term that I might do a half marathon in March... Say the National 1/2 marathon....We'll see!

In Search Of...

Friends! Yikes, it's lonely down here sometimes.

I had it all planned out. I was going to go to the Catholic singles Fall Food festival (sounds hokey, but I need to meet people!). I called the lady in charge. She didn't get back to me until the day of, but as it turns out the youngest person in the group is... oh... 50. Yeah, not so much.

I recovered by making a BUTT load of food. Beef Stew. Apple Crisp. Tuna Fish Salad for the week. Banana Muffins. I did a bunch of errands (dropped off the recyclables - why oh why can't we figure out how to recycle 3-7s??), and joined a yoga place. Looks super nice. I figure if I want to get back into running, it might be a stellar idea. AND, there will be people there! Then I went for a GREAT trail bike ride. ALmost made it to PA. It was gorgeous.

Came back, got warm, enjoyed the wonderful smells in my house. Made fresh biscuits (not from a container with a plump pilsbury dough boy!) and had a friend over for a wonderful dinner! I finished off the night by watching Alias.

Strange thing about biking all of the time... My quads are coming back. I still have this pervasive TIRED feeling that I would like to get rid of (doctor's appt in the near future). I came home on Friday afternoon and fell right to sleep. As usual, I woke up and didn't know where I was, when it was, whether it was night or day. Kind of freaky, but it's how I wake up every morning.

Funny thing is that it seems like the only thing that helps this feeling is to exercise. Weird. :)

Still looking to join a tri club/bike club/running club. I'm starving for friends that are external to this place. I love it here, don't get me wrong, but I need PEEPS!

I hope you are all doing well! I miss you all so much!